Barometer

Flurry of Activity

Freezing rain and snow are predicted for the Triangle this weekend. Students can find creative ways to have fun in the snow by sliding down South Road on dozens of "peace parasols" left by protesters.

Start Your Engines!

Campaign season kicked off Tuesday. Pledging to keep the races clean at all costs, elections officials abolished voting and campaigning in favor of a monarchy.

Fire at Will

The Chapel Hill Town Council tabled a resolution condemning U.S. involvement in Iraq. Officials are afraid residents know about their plans to invade Carrboro and take over its coveted bike paths.

At Any Cost

The UNC men's basketball team beat Clemson at home for the 49th time. Clemson's desperate plan for next year involves rat poison ... a lot of rat poison.

Tar Heel Quotables

"They were so excited to get this tiny $7,000."
Town Councilman Mark Kleinschmidt

"Now everyone has to do things legit."
Elections Chairman Brian Fauver
On new guidelines for student body hopefuls. This year not only do candidates get to make elaborate campaign promises, they actually have to implement them.

"Tuition is a two-way street."
Sen.-elect Richard Stevens, R-Wake
On a one-year ban on tuition increases. One lane is students paying tuition and the other is UNC paying students. It's all logi ... wait, who's been cashing my checks?

"We're a voting committee that doesn't vote but instead operates on consensus."
Student Body President Jen Daum
About the operations of the Student Fee Audit Committee. This balances out the committee that's supposed to reach consensus but relies on the University's Magic 8 Ball instead.