Kvetching Board for September 3, 2010

kvetch:
v.1 (Yiddish) to complain

To the kid walking around campus with a phone charger around your neck, this isn’t Futurama.

So Marvin, if you’re not doing anything for the next month or so, want to be on our flag football team?

Tracey, party of 12: you’re supposed to tip at restaurants on Franklin Street. But happy birthday.

Dear Class of 2014 men, Please fail your classes so I don’t have to act like a cougar. Sincerely, Class of 2012.

Whose brilliant idea was it to bring Karl Rove to campus this month? I’d rather have Snooki.

To my wonderful roommate who came back drunk last night and took a crap on the floor, I can tell its going to be a fun year.

To the girl on Motown’s basketball courts: Thank you for proving there’s no correlation between the amount of skin you show and how good you are at basketball.

To the guy in matching red shirt, shorts, shoes, and hat: You look like a used tampon! Do Better!

I do not know what is more embarrassing: A scandal-ridden football team or a QuickHits editor who does not know the location of Louisiana State University. LSU is located in Baton Rouge.

Dear girls in my apartment building: Thanks for taking pictures in front of my door this weekend during your birthday extravaganza, and not inviting me to the party!
Go Greek! Join the 15% of campus that the other 85% can’t stand!

CTOPS should include an informational session on how to not reply to an entire listserv.

Dear Freshman girl printing out a 90-page novel in the UL at 9:22 AM: Was that really the only time and place you could think of to do that?

To the guy who keeps giving me “the look”: I am trying to give you my best sexyface, but damn, I have to sneeze.

To the padded blue tarps in the Cobb elevator: thanks for making me feel like I’m in a mental institution.

To the freshman who walked into the tree on Stadium late Saturday night: Not only did I see it coming, but I let it happen and then kvetched about it.

To the old man in my BIOL 252 class: I know the tuition hike is taking its toll on everyone, but deodorant is not something you should give up to save a few bucks.

To the guy blasting Bright Eyes on his walkman: you made my day.

To the girl in Child Development who passed out from the picture of the placenta: Good luck having children.

To the freshman in Joyner who can play a bagpipe: You are insanely hip.