kvetch:
v.1 (Yiddish) to complain
To “the Bachelor:” You made my whole week when you gave me a rose on Halloween. If only you were a senior, I’d hit on you. #notacradlerobber
To our (likely armed) CHEM 430 guest lecturer: The slide dedicated to the turret-mounted, remote-controlled machine gun with which you “blazed” targets in the ‘Stan? Not biochemistry.
To the owner of the road bike with cartoon PBR bottles on the frame: You must be from Carrboro too! And no, I didn’t steal your bike, I occupied it.
Hey Student Congress: Giving us access to a lawyer only makes us WANT to sue you. But that’d make you think we’re actually engaged in what you do.
Justin Bieber paternity suit: four words I thought I’d never say. I guess never say never?
To the half-naked girl in the Cowboys cheerleading costume: You’re welcome for picking up the bag you dropped. Did you want me to pick up your dignity while I was down there, too?
Fratstars: it doesn’t count as a costume if you tape, “We are the 1 percent,” signs to what you normally wear. We already knew that.
Toilet paper ply is also a lot like Duke’s number of football wins. It may be 3, but that doesn’t mean they’re bowl eligible.
