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The Daily Tar Heel

Eve: A friend you have not yet met

On March 5, my Facebook feed informed me that 19 of my friends had posted statuses about Eve Carson. Most of the posts were quotes, and many of them referred to the Carolina Way, with which Eve’s memory has come to be synonymous.

The fourth anniversary of Eve’s death leaves the current student body with some tough questions. How do we commemorate someone we never knew? Is it possible to carry on Eve’s legacy without mythologizing her — without forgetting that she too was a college student, complete with imperfections and uncertainties?

And should students feel guilty if they feel distant from Eve’s life, from her death, and from the pain that paralyzed this campus four years ago?

The short answer, as I see it, is no. We shouldn’t feel guilty. Time may never be able to heal the wounds of Eve’s friends and family, but in its passage, an entirely new set of students has populated this university. It is only natural that we feel less of a connection to Eve than our counterparts did four years ago. It would be ludicrous to suggest that we understand what those students felt when they lost her.

The long answer, however, is more complex. As the younger sister of one of Eve’s close friends, I lack the emotional distance of most of my classmates. My first time in the Dean Dome was for Eve’s memorial service. More happily, the first time I drank tequila was with Eve in the living room of her house on Friendly Lane.

I don’t like talking about Eve because my attempts to articulate how remarkable she was always fall short. I am also aware that, in the scheme of things, I barely knew her. Nevertheless, she left an impression on me. She was beautiful, bright in every sense of the word, effervescent and effusive.

But what stands out to me now is how welcome Eve made me feel the first time I met her. She welcomed me into her home, into her conversation, and most importantly into this university, which she loved immensely.

Just because we now lack the personal connections that initially galvanized students to run in the Eve Carson 5K or to raise money for the Eve Carson Scholarship doesn’t mean these causes are irrelevant to students. As long as we go to UNC, and as long as we love our school, we love the same things Eve loved.

Today, in 2012, and for as far as I can see into UNC’s future, Eve will remain relevant not just as an inspiration and an example, but as a means of understanding what is great about this university.

This isn’t about making sense of what happened to Eve; a crime so heinous should never and will never make sense. But the better we can understand what Eve loved and what she loved about this place, the closer we can come to making UNC the best it can be.

I hope the eulogies that appear on this page today and in coming days will help us all better understand who Eve was.

For those who knew her, I hope the stories shared will bring back fond memories.

For those who never met Eve, I urge you to embrace her memory, just as Eve welcomed all those whom she met. My hope is that every student will be able to glean something from these anecdotes that will move them, brighten their day or confirm why they love UNC.

As Eve used to say, “I have friends, and I have friends I have yet to meet.” Consider yourself Eve’s friend, and see what you can learn from her life.

Maggie Zellner is the opinion editor of The Daily Tar Heel. She is a junior comparative literature major from Lynchburg, Va. Contact her at opinion@dailytarheel.com.

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