You have just enjoyed a fine lunch at Lenoir and have made your way to the escalator to begin your descent. Your grimy pockets are stuffed with oranges and bruised apples and your spirits are high.
But you realize that you have forgotten your jacket. You can see it sitting right where you left it on that unwashed table next to the honey glazed ham.
You are faced with a choice. Option one: Calmly walk up to the register, politely explain the situation and proceed up the escalator to grab your jacket. Option two: Take a quick look behind you, skippity-doo-da up the down escalator at full speed and reclaim what is yours (and grab another banana or two while you’re up there).
If you chose option two, you are living the no-teeth lifestyle.
The three pillars of the no-teeth lifestyle have been passed down for generations and according to most scholars, are roughly as follows.
Pillar one: Disregard all social standards and notions of social acceptability. If you find yourself in an 8 a.m. class with required attendance, you could wake up at 7 a.m. like most students and have a socially acceptable breakfast at Top of Lenoir.
Or, you can pack a toaster oven and several Eggo waffles into your backpack and breakfast like a champ in the back row.
Pillar two: The use of the “double nope” and other such debate strategies. The double nope is a form of debate strategy where you counter any opposition with a simple double “nope.”
If you have ever had a conversation like this, you might be living it no-teeth: