I am not a human doing: We need to define ourselves by who we are, not what we do

So, what are you going to do after graduation? It’s a question that’s taken many forms throughout our lives. As kids, people asked us what we wanted “to be” when we grew up. Later, it was what we planned “to do” after high school.

Now, it’s, “What do you want to do for the rest of your life?” And the answer to this question follows an equally predictable formula.

We quickly describe our future professions, fields of study or blurt out the list of extracurricular activities we’ve memorized from our resumes.

Rarely do you hear someone answer with, “I plan to be happy and healthy and spend quality time with my grandma and her 90 year old boyfriend” or, “Actually, I’m just going to be me and see where that takes me.”

We are multidimensional human beings who allow ourselves to be defined by a small and relatively insignificant part of who we really are. We maintain an unfortunate belief that we are what we do. But the reality is that while we should take great pride in our careers, we are human beings — not human doings.

Someone recently introduced themselves to me by asking, “You’re a fitness freak right!?”

I will testify that being labeled a “fitness freak” neither encompasses my character nor moves me to dispense advice on how to work the inner thighs. But it gave me a good laugh and caused me to consider whether I was allowing one part of my identity to overshadow a multitude of traits and passions that make me who I am.

Like I said before, we should take great pride in what we are capable of. However, the tendency to judge based on action rather than self is not only unsustainable but undermines the importance of our character.

Believe it or not, you are much more than your GPA, and whether it rises or falls, you’re still you.

Despite our propensity to fret over the utility of a liberal arts education, we are fortunate to attend a university that has well prepared us to face “the real world,” no matter how daunting its job market.

But more importantly, UNC presents us with the opportunity to engage in experiences and form friendships that shape who we are as people.

This is not to say we shouldn’t be concerned for the future or work hard to secure our dream careers. However, we must remember that we maintain an innate worth for our character that cannot be diminished by even the most horrendous interviews or “menial” jobs. Amazing opportunities emerge from unexpected places. We should embrace our experiences as contributing to our character rather than define ourselves by what we do.

So next time someone asks what you plan “to be” or “do,” consider your answer carefully. While nothing you say could adequately speak to what you hope for yourself and your future, you can avoid a lot of stress and pain if you speak to what you know best — you.