HILLSBOROUGH — In the United States, a citizen’s right to bear arms is one of our most sacred and cherished possessions, right up there with the Snuggie.
And since gun control has become such a red-hot issue in America, I decided to leave the comforts of the office, hit the road and look at it in our area.
It’s the first part in my new series, “Relevant topics: one student’s remarkable journey to beef up his award package.”
My question was, how hard is it for someone to get a gun permit in Orange County? Does it take months? Weeks? Would someone have to know how to use the gun first, or could they learn the old fashioned way: getting drunk and accidentally shooting themselves at home while watching “Buckwild.”
Obviously, I had to go deep undercover for this assignment: As a DTH columnist, I literally can’t go anywhere without people acting like they have no idea who I am just because they get nervous around famous people — so uncomfortable, ugh!
So, I went to the Orange County Sheriff’s Department in disguise to pick up the paperwork — white, well-dressed, polite and with zero criminal record — all the red flags.
The form asks the standard questions — Have you been convicted of a felony? Are you an illegal alien? — and took about 10 minutes to fill out.
The most annoying part is getting three nonfamily friends to sign a form saying you’re not crazy in front of a notary and getting a driver’s license with your current address. (What sane person goes back to the DMV every time they move?)
I returned the form on a Friday afternoon with my new driver’s license, social security card and five bucks.