How to lose like a winner!

I can’t explain it, but something in Andy’s voice told me the news wasn’t good.

“You didn’t get the job.”

I wasn’t sure what he meant, but for the first time, I had a bad feeling.

It wasn’t until he and a few officers explained that if I didn’t stop coming to budget meetings voluntarily, they’d have to taze me that the reality finally sank in: Being the new editor really stings!

The process taught me two of life’s greatest lessons: To always lose with grace, and not winning really sucks.

Now that I’ve had some time to reflect on losing the job, I’ve wasted most of it catching up on “The Walking Dead” — can you believe they killed that one zombie? — but I’ve also managed to put together the best advice on not letting rejection kill your confidence. Here it is:

1. Don’t get rejected: Can’t stress this one enough and, really, this is probably where I messed up the most looking back. Trust me, total bummer. #avoid

2. Lose with grace: When it happens, don’t take rejection personally — most people lose once in a while. It’s the ones who handle it with dignity that we still admire even when they don’t succeed. Above all, be supportive of the winner, which leads to the third most important tip…

3. Acting: You really gotta start selling the supportive crap if they’re going to buy it now. The important thing is…

4. Never burn bridges: Maybe a company will remember how much they liked you and call you for an even better job. Maybe Nicole will accidentally trip over my leg and I’ll have to take over for awhile. Who knows? The point is, keep yourself open to opportunity!

5. Don’t blame others: This one can be hard, especially because it is technically their fault.

6. Examine your own shortcomings, yada, yada, yada…

7. Focus on the positive, then move on: Be proud you put yourself out there; ignore the fact the response was, “Pass.”

Sometimes, it helps to find a friendly face. Students I’ve never met have come up to me and said, “If I had been on that committee, I’d have voted for you.” All I can do is smile, thank them and burst into tears sobbing, “Where were you when I needed you?!”

Other times, the littlest things can put everything back into perspective for you.

Last week, I was feeling down in the dumps when a line in the paper caught my eye — kind of like pink eye infection catches the eye.

In it, UNC-system President Thomas Ross said he knew from the first question he asked Carol Folt that he’d pick her to be chancellor — when he asked her what the best part of her job was, she answered, “The students.”

What could the others have said to screw that softball up, “The free lawyer?”

The whole thing made me remember why I came here in the first place: to make fun of the winners.

I’ve got my work cut out for me. See you next year.