Kvetching Board for Dec. 2, 2016

v.1 (Yiddish) to complain

Here’s the top kvetches from this past semester! Thank you for allowing us to serve as a sounding board for your questions, comments, concerns and above all: complaints!

If you are consistently late to class, will the professor think you have another class that runs over? Asking for a friend who wakes up late.

When your boyfriend wants to be a feminist, but also goes to see Danny Brown ...

When your girlfriend doesn’t realize Danny Brown is a feminist ...

The Daily Tar Heel needs to become more petty. Call people out in the Quick Hits.

Nobody wants to admit it, but the lights in Lenoir are definitely flickering because of the Demogorgon.

To the new daquiri bar coming to Rosemary Street: Thank you for being near my office, and thank you for being in a basement like my soul.

What’s my favorite LaCroix flavor? Trick question because there is no good flavor of LaCroix.

That fun moment when you’re so sleep-deprived that Microsoft Word has to remind you how to spell your last name.

If a DTH “quick hit” had said Muslims were filled with vile hate and inner meanness a retraction and apology would have been printed and someone likely would have gotten fired. But of course no one cares about that double standard because it’s just at the expense of Christians.

If the DTH can really see the future, start using it in a more substantial section than the crossword answers.

If I can hear you chomping on your gum over the sound of our professor blasting “We are the World” in a lecture hall, then your chewing is way too damn loud.

Boyz drool.

All new flowers in front of South Building. Spring, summer and fall. Where’s the money coming from?

How come the office dog isn’t at the office 24/7? Dogs should be a renewable resource, a public good available to all at all times.

I don’t have a kvetch really. I’m just poor and not funny.

I hate that I can’t park anywhere on football Saturdays. I also hate that I don’t feel safe at night and I also hate mayonnaise.

Why are classes allowed to be held beyond South Road? It is so, so far away from anything worth going to. South Campus should be abolished.

Sometimes The Daily Tar Heel opinion page can be a parody of itself.

Send your one-to-two 
sentence entries to 
opinion@dailytarheel.com, subject line ‘kvetch.’