Trigger Warning: Domestic violence, sexual assault
My father was a successful corporate executive. He projected an outward image of being the perfect Christian husband and father. He was a domestic violence abuser.
When my mother kicked him out my freshman year, I hoped he would turn things around and admit himself to rehab. The abuse worsened. The next four years were a nightmare.
He hacked into our home security system and watched us for months. He listened to our private conversations and used snippets of the information to harass us. We thought we were losing our minds. He installed tracking devices in our vehicles. He knew our whereabouts. He showed up at restaurants to threaten us, sent dozens of frightening messages each day promising retribution.
My father never used fists, but he made my family fear for our lives. My mother abhorred guns, but she purchased one to protect us. Our yard was stocked with CPI security signs alerting trespassers that we had cameras. We discussed what would happen if she went missing. She made me the executor of her will.
In February, I followed in her footsteps and obtained a restraining order. Why did it take me so long? One word: Fear.
I feared no one would believe me. I feared my abuser would not be held accountable.
How could I not? Donald Trump has 26 sexual abuse allegations to date. The country elected him president, again. Some argue that character bears no significance on policy. They are dead wrong. Character informs policy.
In one term, Donald Trump eliminated dozens of legal protections for victims of gender-based violence. Trump's Justice Department changed the definition of domestic violence and sexual assault to include only physical harm that constitutes a felony or misdemeanor. This change meant that other forms of domestic violence such as psychological abuse, coercive control and manipulation no longer fell under the Department's jurisdiction.
