For anyone who ended yesterday cowering and wondering how this semester is going to go, one of our beautifully talented digital staff writers is here to help. She summoned the dark mysticisms of astrology and ambiguity to provide you with semi-accurate spring semester horoscopes based on your major(s).
Now, I know some people don't really like astrology and think it's complete crap. I agree, for I am a Sagittarius and am thus naturally skeptical.
In fact, my most recent run-in with astrology was on my weekend trip to Asheville in a creepy, dusty bookstore. My friend opened a book explaining our "love cards" or something. Hers was a super flattering, empowering description all about her drive and knowledge and how she'll defy all odds in her iron-fisted pursuit of her goals. Mine just said I was a "loving mother."
— Danny
QUICK HITS
- The future of affirmative action in university admissions currently rests in the hands of the Supreme Court — and a really salty 20-something who brought the case to them in the first place.
- The Ackland Museum Store is packing up and moving to the far, far away land of literally across the street. It'll now be in the old Clothing Warehouse location.
- The University is reviewing safety protocols following last semester's false-alarm lockdown. Officials are especially looking at how to balance timeliness with accuracy.
- You can now add the Carolina Union Activities Board on Snapchat at cuab_unc for updates on what they're doing around campus. You can add me for the same but slightly more professional reason at dannynett.
IN CAMPUS NEWS
It's official: UNC has banned hoverboards from its dorms. While dorms may still permit hot dog steamers, God bless, hoverboards have joined the ranks of the fog machine, electric wok and two-prong household extension cord on the list of items forbidden by housing. Officials informed us the measure is purely proactive and no incidences occurred to spark the decision. Unsure if the same can be said of the electric wok.
IN Q&A FAME
Tom Ross was quarterback of his high school football team, took the LSAT and GRE in the same day and overall probably deserves to be the protagonist of a Netflix series. Our Assistant State & National Editor Corey Risinger sat down to talk with the former UNC-system president in a beautiful Q&A that makes you low-key feel warm, fuzzy and vicariously heartbroken all at the same time.
IN TOWN NEWS
Chapel Hill's homeless residents who struggle with mental health could be getting help from tiny homes. The UNC Center for Excellence in Community Mental Health is partnering with a local organization to try building a community of tiny homes to offer housing and therapy to those in need. Rent would be projected at $250 per month.
IN OUR OPINION
It's refund check season. Use it well. Trust me; I get it. I am short-sighted and impulsive, and all I want to do with my refund is make it rain Chipotle and Two-Buck Chuck for the first month and a half of school. But I won't do that because 1) I have a replacement laptop to buy thanks to a freak coffee-drinking accident at Weaver Street, and 2) it's the responsible thing to do.
IN THE BLOGS
Our staff horoscope expert can tell you what your spring semester is going to look like based on your major. OK, I know a lot of people don't believe in horoscopes. But mine says, "You'll find yourself overworked and scrambling to fulfill all your obligations." I skipped my first class on FDOC to schedule social media for the DTH. Your move, skeptics.
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