How to deal with October Loneliness Disorder

It's October, and we're obviously pretty excited, but there's something we need to talk about. 

It isn't just the start of holiday flavors at Starbucks and sweater season — it's also the time you're most susceptible to October Loneliness Disorder (OLD). 

Here at Tar Heel Life Hacks, we've got you covered. We've made sure you know how to keep the holiday spirit alive and to love pumpkins without being basic. But there's something we haven't covered. Combatting the spread of OLD, which can hit you at any time and is highly contagious through the winter season. 

I get it. I've been there before (as in right now). You're sipping hot chocolate, and you wish you had someone to share it with. You want to buy a pumpkin, but you have no one to carve it with, and you look creepy toting a knife around your apartment. 

Or maybe you, like me, are terrified of Thanksgiving when your grandparents/aunts/uncles/cousins/uncle's cousins ask why you're still single. You smile and say, "Dating isn't that much of a thing at my college," or in my case, your mother jumps in and says, "She has a lot of guy friends; they just don't want to date her!!!" (Thank you, Mom.)

I get it. So here are some ways to fight back against October Loneliness Disorder. Stay strong.

1. Google couple's costumes. They're incredibly terrible, and it will make you feel so happy to be alone and obligation-free. You can be anything you want for Halloween! ANYTHING. No one can force you to wear this.

2. Have a "Halloweentown" marathon alone in your pajamas. Maybe you could do this with a significant other, but you would likely have to beg them to watch it, and then they might try to distract you from your movies with actual conversation. No, thanks! 

3. Go to Starbucks, order two drinks, and pretend to be on the phone perfecting your lover's order. When they ask about whipped cream, say, "Babe, do you want whipped cream?" really loudly. Throw out the extra or give it to Gary. Pit Preachers get cold, too. 

4. Throw yourself into your studies. Pull all-nighters! Spend all day at the library! When you finally crawl into bed, assure yourself that you don't have time for dating anyway.

5. If you ever see someone and think, "I'd like to cuddle up to them during a scary movie" or, "They would look cute in my Christmas cocktail pictures," just remember: People are the worst. You're lucky you don't have to share yourself with anyone. Treat yourself with candy corn.

There you have it. With these simple tips, you too can avoid OLD. Just remember, it's only a phase. It'll all be over soon.