Junior Chester "Chess" Wellington loves calculating things, especially with his Chinese abacus.
"I got it from an old Chinese mathematician who had set up a cart in Chinatown," said Wellington, casually stroking his handlebar mustache as he reminisced.
Wellington started growing his famous mustache his senior year of high school. By now, it's nearly three inches wide and stretches the length of his entire face, greased tips included.
The secret to his follicle feat, he says, was a pomade he got from a store you've probably never heard of and pure concentration.
"Every morning after I untangle myself from my Urban Outfitters galaxy sheets, I would look straight into a Pier 1 Imports twine-encircled mirror and stare at my top lip for a good 40 minutes," said Wellington.
He would then proceed to repeat Twenty One Pilots lyrics as if reciting a prayer to a higher power.
And yet, despite his handlebar mustache and love of coffee shops and skinny jeans, Wellington is a business school student working on a degree in corporate finance.
"The world of money and the math behind it all really fascinates me," said Wellington. "I also think the corporate world is the perfect fit for an average, ordinary guy like me."
Wellington abruptly ended the interview because someone was reportedly stealing his longboard.
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