Why, by the coiled horns on Ramses’ well-fortified head, are you texting me “Goodnight”?
Currently playing the “Whose boots are louder?” game with every other female on campus. Chancellor Folt going 76 in a 55 mph zone. #PJstatus
Next time someone asks me what I’m doing after I graduate I’m going to respond with “When was your last bowel movement?” So we can both feel unaccomplished and uncomfortable.
I left my last microbiology class convinced I’m doomed to die of either botulism or rabies. Happy LDOC?
To the guy beside me in astronomy: Are you from Venus? Because your atmosphere is noxious. Please bathe.
To whoever decided to hang Christmas balls in the Arboretum: You’re two months early and 6 inches too low. Sincerely, a jogger with a bloody nose.
To all the folks in my Tuesday/Thursday class that had to listen to my hiccups for an hour and 15 minutes: I’m sorry. Trust me, I annoyed myself.
Wow I thought the YDs were bad with “Go Vote” but now the Dance Marathoners have taken it to a whole new level.
I don’t know who should feel more relieved, P.J. or Kate Middleton
North Carolina: Where the weather does what it wants and so do the politicians.
